Some Exclusive Jokes !!!

*A redhead walks into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. She sits down next to this blonde at the bar and stares up at the TV. The 10:00 news was on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.
The redhead turns to the blonde and says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."
The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."
The redhead placed $20 dollars on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 dollars to the redhead and said, "All is fair. Here is your money."
The redhead replies, "Honey, I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and knew he would jump."
The blonde replies, "I did too, but I didn't think he'd do it again"


*An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years.
The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you."
The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."


*Billy Bob says to Lester, "You know, I reckon I'm about ready for a vacation, only this year I'm gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your advice as to where to go. Two years ago you said to go to Hawaii, I went to Hawaii, and Marie got pregnant. Then last year, you told me to go to the Bahamas, I went to the Bahamas, and Marie got pregnant again."Lester says, "So what you gonna do different this year?"Billy Bob says, "This year, I'm takin' Marie with me..."


*Two men are out fishing and they are having great luck. They are catching so fast, they have to go back early."This is so great," says the first guy. "We should mark the spot so we can come here again."
"You're right," says the other guy who then dives over the side and paints a big X on the bottom of the boat.
They head back to shore and just as they're about to dock, the first guy looks at the second guy and says, "But what if we don't get the same boat next time?"

*Men are like.....Computers. Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.